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[Guide] How to use a vibrator to make masturbation successful? | Bestvibe UK

[Guide] How to use a vibrator to make masturbation successful?

Bestvibe May 23,2025

Preface

Recently and friends chat, found a quite common phenomenon:

Many people bought a vibrator, vibrator, tried for a while but felt ‘not as cool as imagined’ or ‘no way to orgasm’.

Obviously, the tools are complete, the atmosphere is also good, but always feel almost what.

In fact, a lot of masturbation or poor sexual experience, not you do something wrong, but ignore the brain's involvement.

Today we will talk about a simple but often overlooked concept: physical and mental stimulation.

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Physical stimulation vs mental stimulation: what is it really?

In a nutshell:

  • Physical stimulation: is what you feel directly in your body, such as vibrators, fingers, body friction, clamping the legs, etc. These are all external physical effects.
  • Mental stimulation: is the feeling from the brain, such as watching porn, listening to erotic audio, reading erotic novels, developing sexual fantasies, or lover's words of love and teasing words to you.

A successful masturbation or sex session requires both of these stimuli to work together.

Why doesn't a vibrator alone always work?

We can use a formula to understand this:

(Physical stimulation + Mental stimulation) ÷ 2 ≥ 100 for a successful orgasm.

Let's assume that ‘100’ is the starting point for orgasm.

If the mental stimulation is only 50 (for example, if you watch a porno that doesn't interest you much), then you need to increase the physical stimulation to 150 in order to raise the average.

But here's the problem: there's an upper limit to physical stimulation, and beyond a certain point, it triggers pain, not pleasure.

 

Everyone has a different level of physical tolerance:

  • Someone might start feeling pain at 120 points;
  • Someone may be able to tolerate up to 200+ points.

The stimulation of the vibrator is very strong, the use of the wrong is very easy to produce pain, once the pain comes, pleasure will be interrupted, masturbation naturally failed.

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Why is masturbation and sex unsatisfying?

Masturbation

Mental stimulation for masturbation relies heavily on the stimulation of your sexual fantasies or adult films.

Vibrators work well, but the higher the intensity, the better. Especially for those with a low pain threshold, what's ‘just right’ for someone else may be too much for you.

To use an analogy: if you like spicy food, choose food that's ‘just spicy enough’ for you, not a hot pot that's too spicy for you to eat.

If you're using a strong enough vibrator and still can't orgasm, it's probably because your mental stimulation is too low, for example:

  • Watching films with unappetising content;
  • Fantasy content too weak;
  • Attention too distracted;
  • The environment is too noisy;

Many people think that if they watch adult films, they are mentally stimulated.

But the truth is, not all films work for everyone, and you need to find material that really gets your brain moving.

Once the mental stimulation can reach 200 points or more, you don't need the vibrator to be very intense and naturally it won't hurt.

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Sex

During sex, mental stimulation comes more from the interaction with your partner.

There's a saying that's actually pretty accurate: the fundamental problem with most sexual failures is that there's not enough foreplay, and the common problems we have are:

  • We have a mouth will not speak, the whole process is silent;
  • There are hands will not use, do not know how to touch;
  • No foreplay, come up to start directly, ignoring the psychological mobilisation.

At this time, the whole mental stimulation is actually very weak, even if the body contact in place, the brain has not entered the state, naturally, it is difficult to have a good experience.

How to improve the quality of sex?

  • Spend more time on foreplay;
  • Communicate more and let each other know what you like;
  • Use words and bodies to express your love;
  • Don't think of orgasm as the ‘end goal’, but rather the enjoyment of the process itself.

By the way, theoretically, if you do a good enough job of foreplay, it is possible to have an orgasm.

That is to say: no amount of foreplay is too long.

And finally

Whether it's one person masturbating or two people having sex, it shouldn't become an orgasm-inducing task.

What's more important than accomplishing an orgasm is whether or not you feel relaxed, engaged, pleasured, or even surprised and secure as you explore your body.

Sometimes it's too easy to blame the problem on ‘the tools aren't good enough’ or ‘the body isn't cooperative enough’, but we forget that it's your understanding of your body and mind that really controls the quality of the experience.

Find what works for you, don't force it, don't compare it, and your sexual experience will be free and authentic.

If this article is helpful to you, please feel free to retweet, bookmark or leave a comment to share your opinion.

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